wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
