im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
my being single is dangerous.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize