he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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