I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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