Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
