i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
