This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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