some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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