Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
There's always time for handjobs
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I want a musical about memes.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
