My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
