adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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