True but thats because hes a fetus.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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