this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Randomize
