If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
