Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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