is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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