Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
