Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
