I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
foreskin is a definite game changer
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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