When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
