I think im going to throw up on grandma
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
