Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
