Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
there is glitter all over my balls
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
