I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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