Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize