yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
