I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
