And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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