im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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