Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
being pregnant is like rehab
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
