This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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