She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
