that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
