wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Well I just put wine in my tea
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
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