just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
