I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
