But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
