Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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