I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
