uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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