It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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