i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Holy shit dude........stairs
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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