I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Randomize
