My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
