Yo dont text me then not text me
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
