he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
