wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
