Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
