I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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