It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
